Tuesday, June 21, 2016


I know my truth...I have spoken it many a time...
When will action meet intention and free me from this

My soul TRAPPED by echoes of yesteryear...leaving my thoughts on tomorrow
and the next moment UNCLEAR.

I know music...as it is understood formerly, is not my path.

Non-Traditional Education Modules...
Doing it out the Box.

I am not traditionally COMPETITIVE
often distracted by the MULTiTUDES
and their INSTENTIONS.

I just DO...when I DO

When I am DOING I am ignoring all the rest.  I am focused and fervent in making manifest MY INTENTION.

Somewhere, got lost along the way.  Now, StuCk in a SWIRL of Past-time Paradise and Folly of Fuck-Ups Foibles and FUNTIMES! 

What of the FUTURE?

How do I SEE MYSELF...going forward?  How do I long to be remembered?  What IS the TANGIBLE legacy I leave behind?

Before you fade away, give me the knowledge of the day...in  a way that it sticks and sparks the FiRe Necessary to TAKE ME HIGHER!!!

Merci La Luna a Solicits.

What to make of the Frequent Flashbacks I have...to specific streets...a la rues a Rive Gauche?  I am there...can feel the heat...hear the Banter a Francais...remember perspective and often times what I was thinking at the time.  Many of the long walks were the result  of low-funds and no MetroPass.  In much the same way as today...I remember spots I have had to strain to continue...as markers of my path and perseverance.  On the day I am seeing...I was headed to INVALIDES...to meet Martin et Julien and chill on the campus of INVALIDES. 
On this particular day, we would also take a tour of INVALIDES, complete with descriptions of where Napoleon was buried and history of the spot.  ALSO, later that evening 2 girls from the states would hit on US...invite us back to their flat and MAKE COMPLETE ASSHo*es if themselves over US/ME!!!

Crazy night...so vivid.

Hmmm...Back to Life/


Wednesday, May 25, 2016


One More Petal don dropped

She shined Bright.

Already a Trooper/Savior/ROCK in the Face of HER Sister's Untimely death from LUPUS

She stood as the MOTHER/Daughter Supreme to her NIECE,

Her Mother and Father,

as well as her GROWING Family.

When her father passed...BIG JIM...her lids grew a bit heavier as THEIR Family shifted once again...LOSING a ROOT that it shook US ALL to the core.

Still, in that way that women do, she forged on...for now she had to little girls to show and grow.

We have to believe that she has done all that she was to do here and that we will be better for it.  We have to know that those two young women have been equipped with enough LOVE and KNOWLEDGE and UNFLINCHING FOSTERism to be Unapologetically be the woman their mother saw for them...sees for them.

We have to believe that JC and Kim shared a union...a LOVE...a Marriage that knew no bounds.  We have to know in the time they shared theirs was as unique a union as any, born of LOVE, TRUST, and Stuff.  Those Little Women being their shared MAIN CONCERN.

We have to know that the LEGACY of LOVE, WIT, FAMILY, StyLe she shared with US will be enough to sustain us.  We have to go on.  We have to do as KIM did...assess the situation, plan and proceed...with a giggle.


I LOVE that I have known a person like you.  When your sister passed, I lost my BIG SISTER.  With you moving ON...I loose my first LOVE...even if it was just Puppy.  That Youthful, Innocent, Raw...Unfiltered Joy someone giggle brings about...the SMILE elicited as you bear witness to their growth and happiness; the shoulder and ear when understanding and pain needed to be negotiated; that HMPH when we commiserated about that BAPs and Beyond; the PRIDE in the Life and Loves borne out of unexpected unions...as well as the need to be ALL that they can be UNAPOLOGETICALLY as we promised. 

I will not forget The Long Talks on the phone...as my first Gi/Urlfriend.
I will not forget The Group, J/J, EC and Y'alls parties
I will not forget the Junior Prom
I will not forget The Vineyard
I will not forget The Dude Ranch
I will not forget Purple Rain and Dougie Fresh Concert
I will not forget the TRACK TEAM and LEAH!!!
I will not forget the wedding.
I will not forget the Laugh; the Smile; The Attitude

We have to know that Big Jim, Debbie and now Kim are watching...rejoicing...Lovingly...Wickedly...guiding our continued steps...as ANGELs do.


I will not forget.


Tuesday, May 03, 2016


HIV Prevention [for some] just got easier.

I am on the Uptown D...heading for my nightly Green...Juice!!!  As I step onto the train...I see 8 posters Up Top...and 4 at Eye Level all proporting in PINK to be able to Prevent HIV.  [I'd just filmed this SAME THING on the DOWNTOWN A] The only problem is...of the 12 individuals captured in the ad, only 1 was a POC [Person of Color]...and while she was darker skinned, SHE was still racially ambiguous. There is an even split of men to women - at least 2 Hispanics and possibly an Asian; but the campaign is geared mostly towards young white males and females.  There was a disturbingly beige to pale market appeal...little to no color. I get it...They are just dealing with those that can be helped.  Young African American Males have seen the largest increase in HIV transmission rates, despite drops by every other classifiable group
Take the path of the least resistance...huh?!

I have seen the proverbial wool pulled back from the ADULT GAMES being exacted on US as a whole. The systemic conditions that are very present HOLDING MEN of African/American decent at bay used to be finessed. However, THE GLOVES have come off. They will shoot us dead and negate us from a PUBLIC HEALTH Concern. The HEROIN Issue is being handled with just a bit more finesse, but not much. These are trains riding not simply through the UWS, Chelsea, SOHO, LES, and into BedStuy, these trains also ride into The Bronx; deep into Brooklyn and all over the many hued corners of NYC. This ad let's Men of Color know there are no options. Taken to the extreme - it is only a matter of time.


I was determined to get out of this city before I Hated it! That time has long past. Perhaps I was lovingly naive when I was in my 20s, however everything about this city now speaks to SEPARATE, not EQUAL. The City is stoking the fires of hate and hurtfulness. Groups are being disenfranchised from their communities by folks needing a spot to study or chill for a bit. Homelessness is on the RISE and so are the RANKS of the 1%. Housing in this city is a joke. The air quality sucks. The City as I grew to know and Love it, has all but been bought up, torn down or phased-out. The caring is in passing. These folks are rushing to something...and they have no interested in over-crowding.

Conspiracy Theories aside, the state to HIV/AIDS in this city living on-line and On PreP...is supposed to be improving, but other STDs have been on the rise.

That said, Brothers...I AM HEAR to LET YOU KNOW...since no one else feels like we are worth it!!!