Thursday, January 02, 2014

One More Step...

So, let me get this straight?
- I am no longer celibate.
- I am now electing to move in with Sekou and J
- I am no longer electing to knowingly move into crazy.
- I am amazed at that I expect anything BUT CRAZY from CRAZY!!!
- Re. that last post, the chick I have been occupying a space with is now TOTALLY BUGGIN'...I mean real, worst case scenario.  I am surprised that, actually, I am not surprised that I was able to endure HER.  I am quite proud of just how have...TRIED and most of the time succeeded in blocking out the crazy that this chick insists on displaying on the regular.  I am not certain just why...other than truly needing to sharpen my LIFE SKILLS, I have experienced half of the things I have since returning to the states from Paris...now 2 years ago.  I have determined I got the worst case scenario of Every Fuck-Up or Foible blurring the line to FUN TIMES* I ever previously experienced in this fair city.  The only difference was...is perspective.

- I am no longer going to accept any less than I am willing to give.
- I am going to be patient...take my time...think things through...and not assume anything.
- I am no longer going to be any less than what I truly am supposed to be.

Re...my future.  I hesitate to even write it, so you can imagine what saying it is like...lol.  That "written"...MUSIC IS MY LIFE.


I am working, once again...towards FREEDOM.
- I AM going to take the GRE and apply to Berkeley.
- I am going to explore other options for moving on from NYC.
- I AM Deeply concerned about my family in GA, HOWEVER I HATE GA.  There is something...amiss there.  The people...all of them seem oblivious.  There is no flow of AIR...WATER...it is too inland, therefore insulated from...reality, almost...lol.  It takes sooooo much to make stuff happen...but it doesn't!!!  That is the thing...
ANYWAY, Ga. is not in my future, although I will visit.

MY PASSION or MY FAMILY...
The Struggle Continues!!!!

- I did struggle with being, living, finding HAPPY in PARIS.  Even in the face of struggle and starvation...I was happy.  I was content simply doing what I was finally doing.
- I LONG FOR THAT ADVENTURE.
- I KNOW IT IS NOT TOO LATE, However IT WILL LOOK DIFFERENT.  I have to be prepared and open to that.
- I will do my best to communicate the best way possible...
- I will FOCUS.
- I will Focus my art eye
- I will Focus my voice
- I will not allow myself to be distracted...unnecessarily, but be aware of AS MUCH AS I CAN.
- I will I work towards appreciating where I am...LOVE it.
- I will work, sing, write, edit, produce, administrate, direct from a place of
- I am no longer afraid.
- I am happy for my adventure and look forward to the NEXT.


Hmmm...



Live and LEARN
Grown and SHOW
Just what I KNOW.

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