...as Bk BURNS.
I am still this evening...morning.
I cannot quite get a grip on what is going on, or perhaps I do.
Meaning, my inability to SEE what is going on, is by fate and design - Let it happen...as it will.
Life...now, feels as though we are at a precipice. I am in NYC...my family in GA.
I am rarely, if ever, truly been afraid for myself. Rather, in the grandscheme of things my family has always been on greater concern than anything else. I worry about them all of the time...it is in my DNA, I guess. I worry...to the point of HAMPERING myself from...
I worry, because we feel disconnected me here, them there. I stayed away from THERE. I was never as ease there. I am here because this is LOVE for me. I worry because THEY are LOVE for me THERE.
My FAMILY is broader...is the concern for THEM is different...There safety is a great concern however, I am not so concerned about their physical, as much a I am their mental.
I look as myself - the golden brown, the amber eye; bald and hunched...frowning and trying to discern what is really going on. How is it going to affect me? How is my life going to change? I sleeplessly wondering about THE NEXT.
Ill fitting...old forms words feelings fears fuckery desires fetishes needs re-actions lies truths...miscommunications...
kicking and screaming...I have been slow to take to what is happening, I believe or am I just bracing myself.
What will I do? How will I defend myself?
How will defend...help...reach my loved ones?
I need to leave GOTHAM.
I can go stay with my parents...in the bottom half of the house or with my sister.
Carry forward as I do.
WHY DO THEY HAVE TO LIVE THERE? I HAVE ALWAYS WARNED AGAINST IT...but I am crazy.
What next??
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